I’m currently working on a project and recording a diary of the process, which often involves some personal sharing—and sometimes oversharing. I recently spoke with someone who admitted to occasionally oversharing on their podcast. I’m intrigued by exploring where these boundaries lie, as they’ll differ for each person.
Why might we want to share more personal details on our podcasts?
The first and most obvious answer is that it builds a stronger connection with listeners. I’ve often emphasised the importance of building a parasocial relationship — a connection where the listener feels they know you.
This is what truly moves the needle. It might sound cynical to say it drives sales, but when people reach out to work with you, it’s because they’ve built trust. You can’t shortcut or fake this process. It’s real, and while it can be done cynically, that approach doesn’t last.
We can also invite listeners to share about themselves, to whatever degree they’re comfortable. By sharing something personal, making a confession or disclosure—to borrow a therapy term—we open up. Every time I’ve had a professional conversation where someone made a personal disclosure, I felt a deeper connection. It’s usually relevant, and we’ll talk more about relevance later.
It also makes the show more relatable. It’s not just about building a connection; it’s about being approachable and human. You’re not putting yourself on a pedestal. Not everyone’s comfortable with this, but you might want to discuss mistakes you’ve made. Not just for the victory lap of sharing what you learned, but to sit with the discomfort and admit “This really sucked. I suffered because I made this mistake or believed something that turned out to be false”.
We’re building a connection, but we’re also revealing what drives us, what interests us, what we like and dislike. For most of us who want to work with others, this information is incredibly valuable. It might feel a bit creepy if someone starts a conversation by reciting facts about your life, like, “Oh, your dog Betsy is turning five now, isn’t she?” But on the flip side, it creates a shared language, a shorthand that you and the listener can use in future conversations.
Taking the film critic approach
When you know what films a critic likes and dislikes, you can triangulate their opinion against yours. For instance, Jonathan Ross — though he doesn’t do much film critiquing anymore — used to host a film show and was into pop culture. I could use him as a barometer for whether I might like a film.
Not because I liked every film he liked or vice-versa, but because I had something to calibrate against. Your perspective can be a way for your listener to calibrate and understand where you’re coming from. It’s a valuable way to share how you see the world.
So, let’s explore some ways we can bring listeners into our world.
Sharing a personal anecdote
I’m a fan of focusing each episode on a specific question, topic, or listener problem. Can you share a personal anecdote related to that topic? If you’re interviewing someone, you could incorporate it into the interview or discuss it later.
I like what comedian Stuart Goldsmith calls a “postamble” or “midamble”. I prefer the midamble, which occurs about halfway to two-thirds through an episode. You step out of the interview to have a conversation with the listener.
Comedy podcasters have used this format for ages, and it works well for anyone. It’s your chance to spend time with the listener, as normally you’re spending time with the interviewee while the listener observes.
You can use this time to update listeners on what’s happening, like upcoming workshops, or to say “This conversation reminded me of a story. I didn’t bring it up during the interview because I didn’t want to waste the guest’s time, but I want to share it with you now.” It’s a great way to add extra context.
Discuss hobbies or interests outside of the podcast
Again, it’s about adding colour to your world and allowing people to see you as a three-dimensional human being. In that midamble section, you could take a quick break to talk about something different.
I do this on my show List Envy. I take a break about two-thirds into the episode to chat about whatever I’m up to that week, to follow up on something from a previous episode, or discuss a recurring theme (like my cats). These little stories can weave a thread through multiple episodes, giving listeners a chance to share a moment with you.
Share a problem
If you’re feeling brave, you could share a personal struggle or challenge that listeners can learn from. The key is to consider how it’s relevant to your podcast and your audience. Don’t share just for the sake of sharing — share in a way that’s generative, useful, and adds value or context.
For example, you could discuss how difficult it’s been to produce an episode. Frame it from the listener’s perspective: “I know you’re busy and understand what it’s like when things pile up.” It doesn’t have to be a complaint session, but a moment to show that you’re human. Maybe you don’t have a staff of 20 people doing your bidding, but you’re still doing your best. It’s an opportunity to show your human side and help listeners relate to you as one of them.
Share something personal
You might want to answer listener questions on air, including those about your personal life. You could set a prompt, like “If there’s anything you want to know about me or what I do, feel free to ask.” Set boundaries, of course. If you’ve shared an anecdote or a difficult story, invite people to share their own experiences. You can anonymise their stories if needed.
Share your two pennies’ worth
For example, after interviews, we often have synthesis or wrap-up sections where we discuss the key takeaways. But what if you said “I have a different take on this.” Maybe the guest changed your mind, or maybe you disagree on a particular issue.
You can respectfully disagree and offer your own perspective, which helps listeners build a clearer picture of you and shows that you’re an independent thinker with your own thoughts. You’re not just a conduit for the guest.
The danger of oversharing
Sharing personal information can, of course, make us vulnerable to criticism and may make us feel more susceptible to attack because we’re opening ourselves up. This is often the fear, though I’m not sure it’s always the reality.
It’s a very real, legitimate concern that if you start telling people about your quirks, life with a disability, or what it’s like doing your work — like being a full-time carer or dealing with a sick pet — it could open you up to criticism or greater scrutiny.
If it does happen, it’ll sting. No one likes to be judged, but you could see it as an opportunity to reflect. But iIf someone is so judgmental or critical that they feel compelled to contact you and leave a negative comment, then perhaps they’re not the right person to work with.
Some listeners might comment that sharing personal details is unprofessional. LinkedIn, for example, is very buttoned-up and corporate. There’s a lot of “inspirational” content, wide-eyed stuff, and carefully curated vulnerability sharing. But there are also many people who say certain things don’t belong on LinkedIn. Again, are these really the people you want to work with?
People who talk about professionalism in this way are often using it as a shield because they themselves feel vulnerable and don’t want to be. They don’t want to let certain things in, and they might not like the idea that others feel comfortable doing so. They might say “This isn’t the place for that,” because it makes them uncomfortable. It’s someone else letting their guard down, and they feel like they’re not supposed to because it’s a work setting. But really, there’s almost no scenario where sharing a bit of your humanity is unprofessional.
Of course, there are limits. But there are so many reasons why sharing a little bit of humanness, a little bit of vulnerability — not completely exposing yourself, but just saying, “I’m here to make a connection” — is valuable.
There’s a possibility that by sharing something personal about yourself, you might alienate listeners who don’t share your beliefs or values. This is a trickier tightrope to walk. You navigate this the same way you would any professional relationship.
I’ve worked with someone whose podcast I fundamentally disagree with. It’s not hate speech or anything like that — it’s just counter to how I see the world. But when I spoke to the person making the podcast, they were nice, polite, and fairly easy to work with. So I didn’t feel the need to address our differences because working with them was smooth.
Your mileage may vary on this. This is why I don’t necessarily share all my personal views on the show. While I’m happy to stand by and defend them, there are things I can let slide or don’t need to get into. You can find that line within your own podcast if there are things you want to share.
A podcast is a great opportunity to share your beliefs in a way that can come across differently or more powerfully than a written manifesto. You can talk passionately about the things you believe in and stand for. And if that alienates people, they’re absolutely not the people you want to work with.
But there are subtleties worth navigating.
Of course, it might feel tricky to maintain boundaries between personal and professional life. When we’re on the mic, when we share our voice, we’re sharing a deeply personal part of ourselves in an unguarded way—certainly more unguarded than video. In video, we adopt a certain posture. We think “I’m on camera,” and it changes how we speak.
So, how can we avoid oversharing?
Decide what’s off-limits beforehand
Set boundaries and stick to them. Say “I don’t talk about my kids” for example. Have this as a written directive so you’re less likely to find yourself having crossed a line you can’t walk back from.
What’s TMI for the listener?
Think about what your listeners might want to hear. What might be too much? A lot of this has been about making you feel comfortable, but there’s also the consideration of the listener. What might feel like an intrusion to them?
Does it help the show?
Finally, keep in mind the primary focus or the goal of the show. Is in service of that goal of the trip. Is it going to help the listener get from a to B?
Some questions to ask yourself when considering what to share
- How much personal information are you comfortable sharing?
- How might sharing that personal information impact the tone or the direction of the podcast? What is the primary goal or the focus of the podcast? And how might sharing personal information align with or detract from it? • How might the audience’s expectations or preferences impact your decision on how much you want to share?
- At what point in the episode do you want to do that sharing?
Add your response